Former Mickey Mouse Club Star Recalls Watching Other Costars Skyrocket to Fame While She Was ‘Struggling to Buy Produce’

Mickey Mouse Club alum Nikki DeLoach is getting candid about what it was like to see her costars shoot into superstardom — while she was struggling to pay her bills.

During an appearance on the Blonde Highlights Podcast on Sunday, Aug. 24, DeLoach opened up about seeing the careers of her Disney castmates — including Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlake, JC Chasez, Ryan Gosling and more — take off.

According to the Hallmark actress, 45, she often struggled with comparing herself to the show’s other actors as she was working to establish herself in the film industry and was “‘struggle busing on and off” for years.

“My idea of the word success changed the longer I was out of Hollywood,” she shared. “I came out of the Mickey Mouse Club and my peers became the most famous people in the world when I was struggling to buy produce.”

“It was really hard because I was like, ‘Wait, God’ — I’m a big faith person — I was like, ‘Did you forget about me? I’m just as talented. I work just as hard,'” DeLoach continued. “Like, how is it that every single one of my friends, Britney, Justin, Ryan, Christina, like they all, you know, became so successful so fast?”

“So, my relationship to this industry had to change a lot,” she added. “And I will say that ‘failure’ probably was the key to being a very grounded quote quote-unquote ‘normal person.’ ”

According to DeLoach, it took her years to be proud of her career as she had “a very unhealthy relationship” with her self-esteem for a long time.

“The industry does that to you. It tells you that you’re only important when you’re working,” she added on the podcast. “People only want you when you’re working. And that is true. That’s how this industry treats you. It can really do so much damage to you spiritually, mentally, emotionally.”

Despite the public perception of working in entertainment, much of the industry is “working class” and is always looking for the next job that comes along, DeLoach noted.

“Our crews and everybody that shows up, we’re job to job,” she shared. “We don’t know where our next job is coming in. A lot of people don’t understand that because they only see the 5% of this industry, which is the glamour and the people that are like, you know, making a lot of money.”

“Only 5% of actors financially make enough money where they don’t have to have a second job,” she added.

When several members of DeLoach’s family — including her son — went through health crises, she was able to realign her priorities outside of Hollywood.

“When you go through a life and death experience, you know, you get really clear on a lot,” she said. “What I realized is my purpose in the world is to raise boys with good self-esteem and self-worth and to make sure that they feel like they are loved.”

“… If God told me I was needed somewhere else, I would walk away to live out my purpose,” she added. “Once I could wrap my heart around that, I actually felt successful in my life.”

Never miss a story — sign up for PEOPLE’s free daily newsletter to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer​​, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.

DeLoach joined the cast of the Mickey Mouse Club in 1993 when she was 14 years old, staying on the show until it ended in 1995. She later joined the girl group Innosense in 1998, but they split up in 2003.

Since then, she’s become a household name when it comes to Hallmark movies — and is set to star in A Grand Ole Opry Christmas later this year. She has also appeared in several other films and TV series over the years, including Love and Other Drugs, The House Bunny and Awkward.

She wed her husband, Take 5 boyband alum, Ryan Goodell, in 2009. The couple shares two sons: William, 11, and Bennett, 7.