When Annalee learned that her daughter Phoenix had gotten her period, she wanted to celebrate the important milestone
Credit: @annuhleee (2)
NEED TO KNOW
- Annalee and her partner adopted their daughter Phoenix in August
- The mom and content creator baked a cake to celebrate Phoenix’s first period, aiming to replace shame with love and support
- The TikTok video of the celebration resonated with viewers and highlighted the importance of meaningful gestures
When Annalee first learned her daughter Phoenix got her period for the first time, she wanted to make sure the moment was one filled with joy, rather than stress.
"I wanted her first period to be met with celebration instead of shame or awkwardness," Annalee tells PEOPLE exclusively of her 11-year-old daughter. "There have been so many firsts and milestone moments already, and each one feels extra meaningful because we don't take any of it for granted."
"Even ordinary things can feel really big when you know how much they represent: safety, trust, healing and growing together as a family. It's been beautiful, sometimes bittersweet, and very healing for all of us," she adds.
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Annalee, 30, and her partner adopted their daughter this past August. However, she says that Phoenix has felt like part of the family for a long time.
"Phoenix had already been a huge part of our lives long before the adoption was finalized," Annalee says. "Our journey was really built on trust, love and showing up for her consistently. When she needed safety, stability and support, we stepped in in a bigger way, and over time it became clear that we were already a family in all the ways that mattered."
"Finalizing the adoption was incredibly emotional because it wasn't just a legal moment, it was the official recognition of a bond that had already been formed through love, choice and commitment."
Credit: @annuhleee
When she was deciding how to celebrate her daughter's first period, Annalee decided that baking a cake felt like the perfect way to mark the milestone.
"So many of us grow up learning that getting your period is something to hide, whisper about or feel embarrassed by," Annalee explains. "I wanted to flip that script for her. The cake was our playful, loving way to say, 'This is normal, this is part of growing up and you never have to feel ashamed of your body in this house.'"
The proud mom adds that it was important to her that her daughter felt safe and supported in a moment that can feel "really vulnerable" for a girl.
"I wanted her to know that her body is not something embarrassing, inconvenient or 'gross.' I wanted her to know that what she was experiencing was normal, healthy and nothing she had to go through alone," says Annalee. "More than anything, I wanted that moment to feel like, 'We've got you. You can talk to us about anything, and there is no shame here.'"
Credit: @annuhleee
Annalee says Phoenix was surprised and thought the period cake was really funny, which was just what she'd hoped for. She shared the video on her TikTok, which resonated with many viewers.
"It turned what could have felt awkward into something lighthearted and loving," she says. "I think it helped take some of the fear or discomfort out of the moment and replaced it with connection and support."
Annalee says she hopes her way of celebrating Phoenix's milestone helps remind parents that kids will always remember the small gestures.
"I think the biggest thing I'd want people to take away is that kids remember how you make them feel during important moments," she explains. "This was about so much more than a cake. It was about making sure Phoenix felt seen, loved and unashamed."
"If sharing this helps even one parent or caregiver approach these milestones with more openness and warmth, then I think that's really special."
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