NEED TO KNOW
- A groom asked Reddit users if he was in the wrong for being upset that his parents contributed over $20,000 more on his sister’s wedding last year than on his recent celebration
- “My entire life all I have heard them say is, ‘We are going to always make sure things are equal,’ and that whatever they spent on my sister’s they would do the same for me,” he wrote
- A portion of Redditors agreed with the groom, arguing that children deserve “the same amount of money” in order to preserve “fairness and respect between siblings”
A groom feels that his parents’ monetary contribution to his wedding is unfair.
In a recent post on Reddit’s “Wedding Drama” forum, the groom asked users on the platform whether or not he’s “crazy” for being upset at his parents for not shelling out the same amount of cash for his wedding as they did his sister’s nuptials.
When the groom’s sister tied the knot last year, their parents heavily financed the celebration. They spent approximately $25,000 total on their daughter’s wedding and reception, plus they covered the cost of her gown — the price of which likely ranged in the hundreds or thousands of dollars, he explained.
“Her husband’s parents paid for the rehearsal dinner,” the poster noted.
Flash forward to this year, and the groom’s parents weren’t as willing to open their wallets. The parents of the groom’s wife “really went above and beyond” by paying for the “entire” wedding. Meanwhile the groom’s parents only paid for the rehearsal dinner, spending $4,000 “at most.”
“I open our gift from my parents this evening and I see a congratulations card and $400…….am I nuts to think they should have given us a larger check?” he shared.
He continued, “My entire life all I have heard them say is, ‘We are going to always make sure things are equal,’ and that whatever they spent on my sister’s they would do the same for me.”
The groom said he’s aware he might sound entitled or “like a brat,” but would have rather his mother and father “not even given us a check,” than to receive the significantly lower monetary gift.
Redditors expressed different opinions in the comments section.
Some users noted that the brother and sister’s wedding costs were divided in the same way, pointing out that in each case the groom’s side of the family paid for the rehearsal dinner while the bride’s side of the family paid for the wedding.
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Other Redditors argued that parents should give their children an equal amount of money for “the fairest approach,” even if the money is not all used in the same way. They said this would “avoid comparisons or resentments,” and make each child feel equally loved and supported.
“I would never give my kids an unequal contribution based on the outdated notion that the bride’s parents pay for the wedding,” the top comment reads. “I would give both the same amount of money and they could either spend it on a wedding or, if they wanted a small wedding or were paying for the wedding themselves, they could put the money towards a down payment.”
Another commenter agreed, writing, “That consistency is worth more than any single gift, because it preserves the sense of fairness and respect between siblings.”
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