Gwyneth Paltrow Says She Regretted Not Having More Kids ‘For a Long Time’

Gwyneth Paltrow used to want to have more than two children.

“My dad [Bruce Paltrow] used to say the only regret he had in his entire life was not having more kids, and I felt like that for a long time until I got yours too,” Gwyneth, 52, told husband Brad Falchuk on the Tuesday, April 8, episode of her “Goop” podcast, while referring to her late father. “I got to tack on.”

She added, “[Our daughters Apple and Isabella] were graduating, and it started to just feel really light and really cohesive. Since then, we’ve had so many moments like that. I feel like it keeps deepening, and it’s such a particular kind of delight to see our four kids in their own relationships and being friends with each other and loving each other.”

Gwyneth and ex-husband Chris Martin, who “consciously uncoupled” in 2014, share daughter Apple, 20, and son Moses, 19. After their divorce, Gwyneth moved on with Glee producer Falchuk, 54, and they tied the knot in 2018. Falchuk also shares two children, Isabella, 20, and Brody, 18, with a past partner.

“We traversed through some really rough things,” Gwyneth recalled to Falchuk on Tuesday’s episode. “One of the most profound lessons that I’ve learned from my relationship with your daughter, which is now so fantastic, is there was [a lot of] testing going on. She was testing me at the time to see at what point I would reject her.”

The Oscar winner, meanwhile, subsequently decided to embody “the essence of maternal” for both Isabella and Brody.

“I was going to be … always loving and forgiving if she acted up and, ultimately, show her that I was so there for her,” Gwyneth explained, noting she wanted to debunk the “evil stepmother” stereotype often prevalent in media. “This dynamic gets triggered by the child, who is resentful or scared or any normal idea that they’re going to lose their dad or their relationship with their dad is going to change, so they push back or they act out.”

Gwyneth would also feel “triggered” by the dynamic, even questioning whether she was “lovable or acceptable.”

“I had to actively remind myself to be the adult at all times,” she said. “There were a few moments that were really, really hard. … You don’t [think you] have jurisdiction, you don’t want to step on toes [because you think] that’s going to make it worse if you assert … my boundaries or my expectations around manners or stuff like that.”

Gwyneth further noted that the stepparent dynamic is full of “minefields,” and she regretted how she chose to interact with Isabella and Brody at first.

“I should have treated them like my kids faster,” she said. “I was too worried about everyone’s feelings, in a way.”

Falchuk, meanwhile, noted that he and Gwyneth “always” believed that they could work through any issues to “build this amazing new family” together.

“It’s been amazing for me to watch all four kids, kind of, grow into this and embrace it,” Gwyneth stated. “It’s almost, like, the payoff is greater when it’s your stepkid than your own kid because … it’s not as natural of a relationship. You’re able to create something with someone who’s not one of your kids but becomes one of your kids.”

She concluded, “I get so much joy out of my relationship with your children. They mean so much to me.”