NEED TO KNOW
- A TikTok user went viral for saying that marriage is no longer beneficial for women
- User hebatalks insisted that women ‘get the short end of the stick’ when it comes to marriage in today’s society
- She noted that women are still expected to work while also doing other household labor and raising children
Marriage is not for everyone, especially women, according to TikTok user hebatalks. The influencer recently made a video stating that she doesn’t believe modern marriages are beneficial for women in today’s society.
“I don’t really believe in marriage, not in modern day, at least, because I would say that the majority of the time it doesn’t work out,” she shared in the video. “And even when it doesn’t end in divorce, it ends in absolutely hating and resenting each other towards the end of life.”
“The reality is that in most marriages, women get the short end of the stick, like women are the ones who have to sacrifice their careers, their health, their well-being, to take care of their husband and the children.”
Despite not being married herself, the TikToker said that she has observed “hundreds” of people in unhappy unions.
She noted that people “go into marriages with such high expectations,” thinking it’s “going to significantly improve their lives,” only to be “quickly humbled within the first few years.”
“I just feel like that actually sets people up for even more pain and heartbreak because society and just like our families have raised us to glorify marriage or to see it as like our end all be all purpose in life, and when you are disappointed by that, you just it leaves you lost and broken and confused,” she shared.
Even though the TikToker feels this way, she admitted there is still a part of her that “craves” marriage and companionship.
“There’s still a part of me that yearns for it. I do feel lonely every once in a while, but I know that I’m better off alone,” she shared. “I’m more so in the mindset of like, if it happens, it happens, but it has to be the most ideal situation, otherwise, I just don’t think it’s worth the time and effort and pain.”
“In marriage, a lot of women’s needs and… desires are very rarely met,” she added.
The video has now gone viral, and amassed 2.1 million views and over 8,000 comments.
The TikToker ended by noting that she has “seen far too many marriages that have failed” to want to put herself through that.
“Or, if they haven’t entirely fallen apart, they leave — at least the woman, for sure — just feeling so broken and regretful of even getting into the marriage in the first place,” she said.
Many commenters added their support to her video. One user wrote, “Men get the best deal out of marriage, a free maid and cook, children that we birth, and we’re expected to split bills.” Another user added, “My fear with marriage is my life will stop for someone else. That’s why I’m not rushing.”
Other users brought up the socialization of modern men as proof that marriages aren’t the same thing they used to be. “The problem is the older generation who did not raise men properly,” one person commented, as another added, “Marriage is only beneficial to men nowadays.”
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Some commenters argued that marriage is only a good option if you find someone who is your partner. “That’s why you marry someone you love. Marriage is a sacrifice on both sides with the right person,” someone else wrote.
“As a man who’s happily married and does so much to take care of his wife, the comments make me very sad. I’m sorry about your collective experiences and perception,” one man chimed in.
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