NEED TO KNOW
- A woman realized her friend’s bridal shower fell on the same day as an important family event
- She took to Reddit to ask for outside opinions on whether it would be okay to skip her friend’s pre-wedding event
- While she knows its important to be there for her husband and his family, she feels “guilty” about having to choose one over the other
A woman took to Reddit to ask if she would be in the wrong for skipping her friend’s bridal shower to attend an important family event.
The 32-year-old explained in her post that the 25-year-old bride is getting married to one of her husband’s good friends. The two women have known each other for about five years and are “moderately close,” but noted that the two men “usually do their own thing.”
“Her bridal shower is this Saturday. For context I wasn’t invited to her bachelorette party, but my husband was invited to the bachelor party,” she writes. “I didn’t think much of it, but it does feel a little uneven.”
While she was originally planning to attend, something else recently came up.
“Here’s where I’m torn: My husband and I have been waiting for 4 years for the day we’d finally get the keys to his grandpa’s farmhouse. This house has been in the family for 4 generations and is really special to him,” she explains. “The family (his aunts, uncles, and all of grandpa’s kids) chose this Saturday—the exact same time as the bridal shower—to go through grandpa’s things and pass down memories and keepsakes.”
She explains that this is “a once-in-a-lifetime, sentimental family moment,” and she feels like it’s important that she be there to “support” her husband and show “respect” to their family.
However, at the same time, she feels “guilty” about skipping the bridal shower at the last minute.
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So, she turned to Reddit to ask for outside opinions on whether it would be okay for her to spend the day with her husband’s family instead of at her friend’s bridal shower.
The vast majority of commenters encouraged the woman to join her family, but also noted that it’s best to communicate clearly with the bride.
“It’s a bridal shower – it’s not a big monumental event to anyone except the bride,” one person wrote. “Send a gift & explain it’s important you spend that day with him & his family.”
“I’ve been married/had a bridal shower and I promise if something carried this much meaning to someone, I would’ve understood and then some. I’ve had to miss showers and I truly can’t recall who missed mine, though I’m sure it happened,” another added. “To play it safe and relieve you of any guilt, just send her a gift off her registry! EZPZ!”
In response to all the comments, the woman noted that she will “buy and send her gift tonight and text her in the morning.”
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